Anyone who has met my little delicate angel, knows there is one thing that is not too delicate about her and that would be her bodily functions. This little 8 pound baby flatulates as loud as a grown man, and I am not exaggerating. When she was one week old, my friend Chelsea was visiting and holding her and she vibrated poor Chelsea's hand! Chelsea told us that no one will ever believe that such a tiny baby could rumble a house that loudly! She is not exaggerating either. The funny thing is that people get a disgusted look and check their clothes after one of her explosions making sure nothing leaked out of the diaper and onto them, when in reality her diaper is probably just as clean as it was before. However this is not always the case...
For instance, last week Michael was changing her diaper midway through one of her morning feedings to help me out by waking her up. I gave Michael a piddle pad (as my sister-in-law calls it) and told him to place it under her before laying her on the bed because we've already had like 5 accidents that have required us to change the sheets/quilt on our bed. Michael thought this pad was a good idea and I was proud of thinking of such a precaution. Boy were we wrong! As soon as Michael opened up the diaper and lifted Gabby's legs to wipe her she let out an explosion of projectile poop! It flew about four feet in the air missing the piddle pad entirely(naturally) and the super soaker feces landed entirely on Michael's bare chest and on his face! As this entire event occurred I tried to hold back the ironic laugh, but it was impossible! We took every precaution and still Gabby managed to still dirty something more than her diaper. Poor Michael's face was pure disgust. He handed Gabby to me instantly and headed straight to the shower without saying a word, probably because he was afraid if he opened his mouth he might receive another unwanted surprise. I think this was probably Michael's greatest fear about changing a diaper and it came true. He handled it like a trooper and surprisingly changed more diapers that day. What a devoted daddy he is! This is only one instance of Gabby's dangerous bodily functions so beware if you ever offer to babysit or change one of her diapers!
For instance, last week Michael was changing her diaper midway through one of her morning feedings to help me out by waking her up. I gave Michael a piddle pad (as my sister-in-law calls it) and told him to place it under her before laying her on the bed because we've already had like 5 accidents that have required us to change the sheets/quilt on our bed. Michael thought this pad was a good idea and I was proud of thinking of such a precaution. Boy were we wrong! As soon as Michael opened up the diaper and lifted Gabby's legs to wipe her she let out an explosion of projectile poop! It flew about four feet in the air missing the piddle pad entirely(naturally) and the super soaker feces landed entirely on Michael's bare chest and on his face! As this entire event occurred I tried to hold back the ironic laugh, but it was impossible! We took every precaution and still Gabby managed to still dirty something more than her diaper. Poor Michael's face was pure disgust. He handed Gabby to me instantly and headed straight to the shower without saying a word, probably because he was afraid if he opened his mouth he might receive another unwanted surprise. I think this was probably Michael's greatest fear about changing a diaper and it came true. He handled it like a trooper and surprisingly changed more diapers that day. What a devoted daddy he is! This is only one instance of Gabby's dangerous bodily functions so beware if you ever offer to babysit or change one of her diapers!
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